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Evermore, chapter five
In which we have a lunch scene with Haven and Miles just being wonderful.
So we start this chapter with Damen sitting with Haven and Miles at lunch and Ever just dreading sitting there. They start sharing fake backstories and I have something to say:
"I was raised by a drag queen and a romance novelist,"
Miles says, reaching over to steal a candy corn off the top of
Haven's pre-Halloween cupcake.
"Sorry, that wasn't you, sweetie, that was Chandler on
Friends."
I turned around after reading that and asked my almost 14 year old sister if she’s ever heard of a show called friends. She said no and she only watches cable. Now, I’m sure there are still teenagers who remember Friends, but with the show being over and done for years now less and less people know about it. I find that the big sitcom now is The Big Bang Theory.
And it’s not just this, at almost every page there seems to be a name drop of music bands, clothes, electronics and such. It’s like the author is overcompensating and in doing so it detracts for the story and dates the book. It kinda reminds me to Disaster movie and all those movies that are lame pop reference jokes. Less is always more. It’s better to name a brand at some point or a name that actually means something and you feel 10 years from now will still be understood than just namebrand anything and everything. Moving on.
Haven tells her story and I have no patience with this girl. Damen follows up he’s lived in Italy, France, England, Spain and a whole lot of other places while drinking an “iridescent red liquid.” I’m kind of wondering if that’s the word she wanted to use for that. And even if it was the character of Ever up ‘til now didn’t really seemed like the kind to say something like that. That’s something Bella would say.
The conversation then turns to Ever and the fact that she comes from Oregon. Damen turns the sleaze meter up as he asks Ever how did she end up there. Haven takes this opportunity to turn the bitch o meter up and sticks to Damen like hot glue. Ever in turn just goes on to talk about the pain of just thinking about moving this place. Damen stares at her and she drops the water.
Falling so fast, I can't even
stop it, all I can do is wait for the splash. But before it can
even hit the table, Damen's already caught it and returned it
to me. And I sit there, staring at the bottle and avoiding his
gaze, wondering if I'm the only one who noticed how he
moved so fast he actually blurred.
Subtle, Damen. Go do that with an apple next you idiot. These hiden supernatural creatures sure suck at being inconspicuous, don’t they? Then again Ever’s reaction…
Then Miles asks about New York, and Haven scoots so close
she's practically sitting on Damen's lap, and I take a deep
breath, finish my lunch, and convince myself I imagined it.
I love how blase Ever is about the man who has no aura, drinks weird juice and has super speed. Because surely that isn't;’t important at all when you’re as hot as Damen. She’s lucky she’s the star of a romance driven supernatural YA novel, otherwise she would be the first to go.
Damen then leaves and Ever pitches a fit at her friends for inviting him. Miles tells her to relax before announcing they also invited him to her house so they can monopolize his time. Haven even shouts:
"My meeting's over by seven, which gives me just enough time
to go home and change. And, by the way, I call dibs on
sitting next to Damen in the Jacuzzi!"
Haven, stop calling dibs on the guy. If you want to do something just do it. Also, he does have two sides, they can sit beside him if they want. Although all this attention is bound to scare the guy away. But she doesn’t care as she leaves giving Ever the opportunity to explain her friend’s actions.
You see Haven is an attention whore apparently and is in need of a fix. Sadly her family is indulging her by ignoring her new goth style. So the girl in turn goes to twelve step meeting lying to everyone in there who actually need her just to get her fix. This isn’t so bad except “Today’s meeting” is for over eaters and Haven is five foot four with “the body of a musical box ballerina”. I’m pretty sure her being there is not helpful.
Ever then keeps talking about how her previous friends withdrew from her a bit after the accident and so she imposed this self inflicted exclusion from her cliques to join her true friends… who force her to do things for their amusement, don’t take into account her feelings if it benefits them and gets one being a jealous harpy. I’m not sure this was an upgrade sweetie. But Ever still believes this and says:
And that's exactly why I need to stay away from Damen
because his ability to charge my skin with his touch, and
silence the world with his voice is a dangerous temptation I
cannot indulge.
I won't risk hurting my friendship with Haven.
And I can't risk getting too close.
Oh, noes, now they won’t be together forever! (eyeroll) This is chapter five and this thing has 27. Let's see how long that last. I say they do in 5 chapters more just to take it back just so she can angst and he can grovel, just so he can turn distant and cold and Ever wonders “what’s wrong with me?!”. Then Damn loves her again but then his fangirls in a fit of jealousy unite under Haven, who after all her wishing of being a “true goth” under her misguided notions turned to Satanism. Ever then has an epic battle against her once friend and fight to get her man back for she is the beautiful soldier of love and justice sailor—no, wait, wrong tangent.
Anyway, tomorrow is The host, if it all goes well. For now this is Shaolina signing out.
(Chapter six)
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Forget Damen, *these* people are the ultimate control freaks! They're so controlling, selfish, and insensitive that it's unbelievable! They're just as manipulative and controlling as Edward Cullen! And they're supposed to be her friends? Like you said, Shaolina, what was wrong with her old friends? Did they make her do stuff like this, too?
And what is Ever going to tell her aunt when she comes home? Did they ever think of that? "Hey, the new kid in my class is coming over tonight because my friends invited him here. ...No, I didn't invite them here, *they* did."
If you like him so much, then invite him over to *your* houses! Stop dragging your friend into this! She doesn't want anything to do with him, so leave her alone! Man, with friends like these, Ever really doesn't need enemies.
Did Noel do this on purpose? Just so that when the time comes for Ever to ditch her friends for Damen, we won't feel bad about it? Just like Meyer ruined Charlie's character in "Eclipse" so that we wouldn't feel sorry when Bella ditched him for Edward? Because believe me, I don't think that Ever can leave these people fast enough. I would prefer if she didn't do it because of Damen, but regardless of the reason, she just needs to grow a spine and get away from them.
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"And what is Ever going to tell her aunt when she comes home? Did they ever think of that? "Hey, the new kid in my class is coming over tonight because my friends invited him here. ...No, I didn't invite them here, *they* did." "
Are you kidding me? The aunt is never around. Seriously 5 chapters and so far we've only had expository flashback of her. This is a no grown ups world. So I doubt she will find out, and if she does she won't care.
And I'm not sure that's her intent since I'm pretty sure we're at least supposed to like Miles. And I'm really despising Haven. She doesn't even talk to Ever ever. All she does is claim Damen, glare at Ever and be an attention whore. She just keeps getting worst and worst. It's like being stuck with a gothy Alice. She's the one doing all these thing to get to Damen, I just dislike Miles for going along with a shit eating grin on his face, but at least you see him communicating with Ever on some level so I end up feeling less enraged at him. I would have dropped these two like rocks and looked for a hobby or something else.
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(Anonymous) 2010-08-20 06:03 am (UTC)(link)I... I actually feel like BURNING my book of this.
-shrug- Must be the pyro in me.
Anyway, he's doing it on purpose, the inconspicuous thing, but this is what Meyer had to do with the car accident scene in Twilight.
Make everyone. Rock. Stupid.
How else did no one notice him catch her water?
-snort- Yeah, in later chapters she does "Give in to her gorgeous hot flammible Edwa-Damon forevers and evers."
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(Anonymous) 2010-08-20 06:04 am (UTC)(link)Peace.
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And as obvious as that was, try avoiding spoilers sweetie. I had to stop reading your sentence when I noticed the "in later chapters"
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(Anonymous) 2010-08-26 08:54 am (UTC)(link)And, why isn't she wary? Or curious? Or at least cautious? I mean, he's he first person she's EVER (c wat i did thar?) seen who has no aura. Noel sure likes characterizing Ever as a doormat.
And it doesn't help she's a blonde, I don't have anything against that, but friend of mine is pissed. Off. Can't stop ranting while flipping pages of my cop-HEY! YOU TRY PUTTING A FLAMETHROWER TO THAT BOOK ONE MORE TIME AND I WON'T BE ABLE TO SELL IT!
Hell, I have to go, she's started swearin-MOM'S GONNA KICK YOU OUT IF YOU BURN THE CARPET!
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I sit there, staring at the bottle and avoiding his
gaze, wondering if I'm the only one who noticed how he
moved so fast he actually blurred.
Damen IS the Flash. And apparently he likes cherry Kool-Aid with rainbow sparkles in it.
I need to stay away from Damen because his ability to charge my skin with his touch, and silence the world with his voice is a dangerous temptation I cannot indulge.
Well, I can understand that. Having electricity fill your skin when a guy touches you and going deaf when he speaks WOULD be unpleasant.He sounds like walking Kryptonite. I advise her to stay away.
Also, why is there no plot in this entire book?
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Oh, but she mustn't stay away from him since they are meant to be together forever and ever. But yeah, being around him sounds annoying at best instead of thrilling.
And there's a plot... kinda. I guess we are in that part of the book where we have to figure out what is up with the mysterious hottie. Thing is that Ever is technically supernatural so she knows that Damen is supernatural. But she refuses to believe he is by telling herself he has no superspeed and not really thinking about the fact he has no aura and only dead people are like that.
I would be so wary of him and I would start to think that he has glamour superpower and that's why he's driving this school nuts. I would ask for self defense classes and prepare Buffy style just in case because undead hottie just screams "Danger! Danger!"
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1) He's impossibly good-looking.
2) He drinks an unspecified red liquid.
3) He has powers that normal humans don't--super speed and the ability to charm everyone around him. Please note that being fast and appealing are excellent skills for a predator.
4) He has no aura, which in his universe's terms means that he is dead.
There are not many choices. He's solid, so he's not a ghost. Werewolves are alive. So are fae. Zombies are animated corpses and generally NOT in the best of shape. And there's only one supernatural species that specializes in consuming red liquid.
So, as I said, there's no plot and no tension. Since Ever is a supernatural being herself, she should be sufficiently Genre Savvy to figure out what Damen is. And, for no adequately explained reason, she isn't.
The girls in my books are going to be Genre Savvy. I refuse to have any characters around who are so willfully DUMB.
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And the tension is also killed by the name of the series. It's called "The immortal series". Well jeez, I wonder if Damen is an immortal.
I'm with you. Like right now I'm working on a story where the main character is a 19 year old girl. Her education level is equivalent to our sixth grade and grew up isolated so she's small minded. But she's good at her trade which would be handywoman/carpenter in our world. She's not book smart, misreads things (she learned how to read when she was 13 so she does it badly from time to time) and takes things at face value (which ends up creating trouble for her). But she's creative and smart in a practical way. Lock her in a room with a door with hinges and she'll remove them. She also starts learning about the world as she goes along and becomes a better individual through her journey.
While I don't make her a brainiac, she's not stupid. I don't like making stupid characters just to make my job easier. Plus I believe everyone is smart in their own way. Making somebody 100% stupid like in here just annoys the heck out of me and prevents me from liking Ever.